Doubt Has a Place in Your Story

Written by: Bryan Willkom

“Doubt is unsettling to the ego, and those who are drawn to ideologies that promise the dispelling of doubt by proffering certainties will never grow. In seeking certainty they are courting the death of the soul, whose nature is forever churning possibility, forever seeking the larger, forever riding the melting edge of certainty’s glacier.”

- James Hollis, “Finding Meaning in the Second Half of Life, How to Finally, Really Grow Up”

Bryan here.

I thought I’d share this picture from our family road trip to Glacier, MT last summer. Specific photo location: The Grinnell Glacier Trail from the St Mary’s / East Entrance to the park.

Other-worldly isn’t it? It was breathtakingly beautiful and we were lucky to have made it.

The year before, Anna had knee surgery (a torn meniscus). A couple months before, I injured my achilles (classic 40 year old dad move). I was also having back issues. In addition, our van’s transmission went out long before it should have. Fortunately, this also occurred before we left, which led us to buying a new van, which was probably one of the more depressing purchases for someone in Christian ministry.

Turns out, a van, knee and achilles are pretty important to the success of a trip like this. But, we made it. And now, we mostly share these amazing pictures.

The real story wasn’t so glorious - it was filled with an unsettling amount of doubt. Doubt was along for the ride that summer and whether we like it or not, doubt is a traveling companion in our spiritual lives as well.

I just couldn’t resist sharing this James Hollis quote with our family photo, because before our mountain-top experience, we were in fact, “riding the melting edge of certainty’s glacier.” Literally, on a glacier.

Pictures from the summit are never what they seem are they? They never tell the whole story. Probably, because no one is snapping pics of suffering (usually) or the quiet moments of preparation before a journey begins (boring).

Maybe it’s because fear is just hard to photograph? Or maybe it’s because we’d prefer not to give doubt a place in our story - even though it’s in steady operation below the surface, changing and moving us slowly, like a glacier.

What if we gave it a place?

What if we normalized doubt in the church? What if we gave uncertainty a seat at the table? What if we didn’t just make room for our questions and vulnerabilities, but starting leading with them?

What might happen?

To quote one of our leaders for Question Church, “If my vulnerability in disclosing these religious doubts… allows others to embrace their doubts and questions, then this work will have been worth every risk and consequence.” - Keith Long from his book, Doubting Faithfully, Confessions of a Skeptical Pastor

I agree with Keith - one person’s doubt is another person’s permission.

Permission to wonder, question, start over, be honest, say the hard thing, unload some baggage etc. It just feels so damn good to not have it all figured out, doesn’t it?

Mountaintop experiences and Instagram-able photos aside, I believe we need to start giving language to this in-between experience many of us are having. The liminal, threshold, waiting, wandering, leaving behind, one-foot-in-front-of-the-other moments. (Add in some healthy spiritual practices too!) Not only will Question Church be a new space for this, but all JesusFit Churches.

And the REALLY EXCITING NEWS is that now you don’t have to live in Eau Claire to meet us in the in-between in 2026.

So check your transmission and take care of your achillies, and hopefully, I’ll see you on the edge of certainty this year.